A couple days ago (in fact, the day that I posted my last blog), I decided that this week I wanted to talk about why I'm still struggling with my writing schedule. But in order to fully explain that situation, I have to talk about something I'd been keeping relatively quiet. It's not a secret, per se, but it is something I haven't brought up because it's become a divisive topic in the past year.
Elianna is in pre-school.
Since the shut downs started last March and April (oh my god, has it been ten months? Oh my god has it ONLY been ten months...), Jason and I struggled with whether or not to start Elianna in a mother's morning out program. Since I don't work, we didn't want a full daycare program (even though the daycares in our area are incredibly stellar). We wanted something that would give me a couple hours off a couple days a week, and something to get her socializing.
At her nine month appointment last April (oh my god, she was only nine months last April?) we expressed our joint concerns to her pediatrician - what about COVID exposure? But what about stunting her social growth? What about her lagging gross motor skills, and what about vocabulary skills, which are generally things that being exposed to other children helps them pick up?
We started looking into schools "late." I was really depressed last winter; I didn't start to come out of that 'til February, and that's when we started looking - and that's also generally after most schools start enrollment. We found a school we seemed to like - a local preschool that came VERY highly recommended. I scheduled a tour, knowing that if we liked it we'd be on the waiting list. But I was kind of OK with that - it gave us time to think, consider infection rates, talk to Elianna's doctor, etc., before school started in August.
I went on the tour on March 12. I was impressed with their precautions - sanitizing, distancing, keeping any kids in the hallways walking neatly against one wall - and asking us to keep our distance from the students and not approaching the open classroom doors. Jason was impressed with their security measures, and I had gotten a really good feeling from the ladies leading the tour - including the director, who lives two houses down from me.
That evening, I added Elianna to the waiting list. The next morning - Friday the 13th - I received an email from the school, saying that due to COVID they would be shutting down indefinitely, but they would be in contact with us over the summer regarding waiting lists, reopening, and any new procedures they might implement to help mitigate the spread of the virus. (Spoiler alert - it was seven pages of new health safety procedures.) It honestly just made me feel better about our choice to send Elianna to school there. This was two weeks before Georgia's governor issued stay-at-home orders, and three days before the White House had their big press release on "Flattening the Curve."
We felt good, personally, about our decision - especially after receiving updates on new procedures throughout the summer, and sharing them with our doctor. But I hadn't talked about it except to just family and a few close friends, because how to handle kids in school during the pandemic has been SO divisive. I don't like pissing people off, I don't like getting pissed off, and I didn't have the time for people's judgment.
My sister, who gave birth to her first child in July, and who is a 5th grade teacher, has had the same struggle, times ten. Both of us constantly wonder - am I doing the right thing for my child? for my mental stability? what about the teachers and caregivers? We both have heard the "you're a terrible parent because you're sending your child to school in person/keeping your child home for online learning" and "you're a terrible person - you're putting your child's needs ahead of the health of teachers and caregivers." I'll be the first to admit that I've been judgy of friends' and neighbors' choices with their children this past school year - but I try to keep it quiet. I try not to bash people's personal decisions on social media. I try to be supportive when I can - and silent when I can't.
Which brings me around to why I'm breaking my silence about Elianna's school.
I've been trying to get back into writing. I arranged my schedule so that I work on my writing on Tuesday and Thursday mornings, while Elianna is at school. (Recently I've also been able to add about 45 minutes while she's in physical therapy, but since she's improving and we're dropping down on the frequency of her sessions, that schedule is changing now, too.)
However, late last Friday, Cherokee Schools announced that, due to the number of teachers either currently sick with COVID, or quarantining due to exposure, they no longer had the staffing for in person classes (yes, not even a full week after coming back from Christmas), they would be going virtual at least this week. Elianna is not in public school - but the children of many of the staff at her preschool are. Over the weekend, we got an email from her school letting us know that her class would not meet this week due to staffing issues. Further, if Cherokee remains closed, it's likely her school will also have to close. And while they do have a plan in place for digital learning that means that, 1. I'm still having to supervise Elianna during the time I would normally have while she's at school and, 2. I don't know how much digital learning you can really do with 18-month-olds.
So... there it is.
And, yes, I know most people don't give a hoot whether I'm meeting my writing schedule. But I give a hoot. I feel the need for accountability. But that accountability required an explanation.
Elianna and her class, the last day before Christmas.
(All photos are by her teachers.)
Elianna and her best bud on the playground.
Elianna loves school! (This was taken the same day as the “Grump on a Tractor” incident…)